Memoirs Of A Geisha-American

Me No Luv You Long Time...

Monday, February 06, 2006

YELLOW FEVER!

YELLOW FEVER

Hahaha...this little movie ^ is simply hilarious....yet so TRUE...and so SADDD. Cuz, that used to be ME - one of those pathetic little cumdump groupies looking for a White KKKnight to save me from my own self-hatred.

Truth is, the only White "meat" I could ever scrounge up was JUST like the guy in that film - shaggy-haired losers
outcast from their own "kind."

But TO ME, they were GODS - as I projected my own Hollywood idealism upon them like movie screens.

Kinda weird to look back now – and wonder what the h*ll I was thinking back then! It’s like looking back at high school pix of what you thought was so “cool” back then – but now you find utterly ridiculous. Well, hindsight is 20/20 and only when you’re out of the forest…can you SEE the forest.

Well, that admittedly took me a good while, but I couldn’t help but for reality to slowly sink in with each and every dismal encounter...

I won't go into my full memoirs here yet (I may save that for a book later), but the lowlights might include that "cool alternative" guy who bragged about how he had 17 piercings on his pud! Well, after revealing his pud, the really impressive thing was how he could fit that many piercings on a unit the size of fishbait! In fact, it did resemble a tiny earthworm with about 17 hooks in it! Lmaooo.. :(

And then there was the guy who had conveniently
"forgot" to tell me he had the clap...until I found out the hard way when things down there starting getting painfully nasty! In fact, I could write a whole chapter on shaggy White guys giving me gifts that keep on giving...

Anyways, one day after a particularly self-degrading and disappointing episode...I woke up and took a good look in the mirror at myself...and then my sleeping baboon on the bed. And I finally realized - like an incredible awakening - that MY OWN SELF-HATRED >>> MY LIKING OF THIS WHITE APE!

In other words, I didn't really like White men...so much as HATE MYSELF!

"Woooaa...did someone just hit the light switch in here?" I wondered? All of a sudden it hit me like OJ’s backhand - you can't find your self-esteem in another person...or another race - but only YOUR OWN DAMN SELF! Yea, quote me on that Dr. Phil! DUH!

And so THAT was the BEGINNING of my slow crawl out of my self-destructive addiction to pink wigglers...and towards my future degree in Psychology! :)

Sincerely,
Rebecca Yu

Turning Point

So...I just admitted how brainwashed I was - but I blame it on our dominant social programming here. The constant media and Hollywood propaganda that made me hate my own skin. But, I'm past that now, as you can damn see! No more pinky passion for me!

I mean, really, I shoulda known better. I still vividly recall my first intimate exposure with a White man. He proudly pulled it out...and I thought to myself:

"Ew, it's PINK. PINK like the inside of a too-rare hamburger! PINK like a soft pussy! PINK like a fetus!"

Well, he wasted NO TIME in stabbing me with his little pink eraser, and I was simultaneously horrified and amused at the sight of what looked like a tiny wet shaved gerbil scampering in and out of my mousehole. I nearly erupted...in laughter. Choking back my laffs, he must have misinterpreted my grimacing as PLEASURE, lmao!

"Oooh yeah baby, take that big red American DICK!" he grunted as his face turned nearly as red as his nub. As the veins on his scrawny neck bulged, I wasn't even sure which head he was gonna cum out of!

I could hardly contain myself now...this was just too much. My eyes were welling up with tears. I was about to explode in pure laughter - hoping to fake it as an orgasm to get him out of me...

When he made a funky constipated/O-face, quivered and shot his load in record time.

Whew.

I cleaned up...while he asked me how "damn good" he was... And if it was so "different" being with a White man, and worrying if he "hurt" me with his "size."

Well, this was just going from hilarious to pathetic now...if he ONLY KNEW! Next, I was sure he was going to ask me to breastfeed him like his mama! So, I quickly lied, and told him wow, he was INCREDIBLE, to stroke his desperate White male ego and alleviate my own guilt at being completely turned off and disgusted with this loser's bedside manner. So, he gave me something to bych about on the net, I gave him something to brag about. Well, who says life is fair? And, when you deal with White men, you WILL definitely get the SHORT END of the STICK 9 times outta 10!

Well, bad experiences happen with anyone. But sadly, this was one of my better ones with "mighty Whitey." I'd rather not assume they're ALL losers, just perhaps the ones who "specialize" in Asian women?

Ladies, I know y'all can relate to this! There's a reason why lotsa White chix don't even date 'em anymore! Now I know why!

Truly,
Rebecca Yu

Konnichiwa...mothafvckas!

Hello all. I am a psych major who used to be your classic self-hating Asian-AMERICAN girl with a fetish for all things vanilla ice. See, I never wanted to be the ASIAN-American girl, but the ALL-American girl. And the easiest shortcut and litmus test to that in my narrow eyes was...a trophy White boyfriend (nerdy slob or not).

Anyways, after a looong series of demeaning and fruitless encounters with White men, I finally came to the conclusion - that they were never dating ME, but the warped Hollywood hentai fantasy that they projected upon me.

And upon further research, considering the historical sexual legacy of White men in particular - often coupling with Black slaves, wartime "gooks," native heathens, mail-order brides from impoverished countries, underage children and barnyard animals - I came to the simple conclusion:

White men most prefer to mate only with creatures they feel are INFERIOR to themselves. In the pre-feminist era, that included most White women. However, since the 60s, they have been forced to omit many of them in favor of race-climbing minorities, children and occasionally 4-legged mammals.

So, where I USED to feel flattered by their crude advances and gropes, I can now only feel deeply INSULTED and enraged!

Ladies, heed my warning well and ask yourselves the same hard questions that I have - before you waste half your life chasing fool's gold. Please don’t learn the hard way like I did!

Sincerely,
Rebecca Yu